Hidden Challenge of International Dating in China

Dating in China is a lot different from dating in America. That’s because their dating culture is vastly different, more specifically Chinese take it more seriously. While westerners have different reasons to date, Chinese have a singular goal which is marriage. For them, each date is a potential life partner.

If you are eager to settle down eventually, then taking your pick from one of Chinese women just might be the answer to your dilemma. But because of the cultural differences, the experience might take some adjusting. On top of the language barrier, it’s only natural that you encounter some bumps along the way.

Some problems you can better prepare for. For example, one way to avoid miscommunication is to learn Chinese (or at least learn enough to get your point across). But there are also problems that you wouldn’t have anticipated. When you are serious about dating in China, here are some of the hidden challenges you might have to deal with:

1. Logistics

One of the challenges of international dating is planning to meet up regularly. A lot goes into organizing those meet-ups, such as accommodation, transportation, schedule, and location. Because of that, planning a meet is almost like a part-time job.

If you are going to put up all that effort, she better be worth it. After all, this going back and forth is not only going to be costly but also meticulous. To know if she’s worth it or not, one sign is that she’s willing to meet you halfway. Even little things like helping you with the planning or even suggesting other cheaper places can go a long way.

You know you’ve found the right woman if she puts up as much effort in the relationship as you.

2. Lack of common ground

On top of the language barrier and cultural differences, there’s also the chance that you have little things in common. While there are couples who are polar opposites of each other, those relationships don’t last that long. Couples need to be compatible enough so their relationship has a solid foundation.

One of the challenges of dating someone with a different nationality is it might take you longer to discover whether you are compatible with a Chinese woman or not. For this reason, it really helps to either learn some Mandarin or even hire a translator. That way, you can eliminate one barrier in getting to know her.

But this process of really getting to know one another might just work out for you, because, as mentioned earlier, the Chinese take dating seriously. Dating in China vs America is the goal of eventually settling down. Which means they thoroughly get to know their dates before committing to a relationship with them.

3. Not enough of time with each other

It goes without saying that spending time with one another is crucial to making a relationship last. The time difference can also affect how you conduct your relationship. You’re constantly trying to communicate to each other while both of you are still up. Any missed opportunity would be disappointing.

Sadly, there will be times when you don’t spend as much time together, especially when you are both living in different countries. One remedy for this problem is one of you has to move, which is rather drastic if you aren’t ready to take that next step yet. Another alternative is to just accept that you would have to respond to each other as soon as you can.

Lucky for you, there are free dating sites for serious relationships that would not only help you meet the right woman but also communicate with one another once you’ve committed. The important thing is you dedicate spending time together regardless of how that happens.

4. Competition

Chinese women have their own lives to lead. Just like everyone else, they have to go to work, have hobbies, and have friends. Naturally, they are also bound to meet people, such as other men. It’s possible that some of them would want to pursue a romantic relationship with your date.

Because of this, couples in long-distance relationships sometimes worry their partners find someone else while they are apart. It’s not so much that they don’t trust their partners but more the people around them.

If you don’t want to worry about your woman being stolen from you, better pick a woman that is loyal, faithful, and dedicated. To find out if your date possesses those qualities, it helps to really get to know her by reading her profile and eventually talking to her.

5. Conflict resolution

Arguments are natural in every relationship. No matter how compatible couples are, they also have their differences, which can sometimes test their relationship. However, long-distance couples have it tougher because the language barrier and time difference might present some challenges in resolving any arguments.

One way you can work around is to commit to resolve the conflict right then and there. But if you don’t have enough time left, make sure to schedule another time to resolve your argument. The period away from each other might even help you see things from her perspective. By then, you would be more open to each other’s feelings and even compromise.

Tiptoeing around each other is not going to solve your conflict. If anything, that just might make the problem worse until such a point you both couldn’t stand each other anymore. So while resolving problems with a long-distance partner is hard, it’s certainly not impossible.

All of these issues are difficult to deal with for couples of the same nationality, but even harder for couples taking part in long-distance relationships. And when you are dating women in China, you also have to be mindful of Chinese dating etiquette and other cultural norms.

Online dating services have certainly made it easier to stay connected with one another. The internet has also made it easier for men to find and date Chinese women (more specifically Shenzhen women). Ultimately, as long as you found the right woman, you have to do what it takes to keep your relationship strong.